In Memory of Phyllis Rosenberg:

“Vos Vet Zayn?”  “What’s It Going to Be?”

Today is the eighth anniversary of my Mother’s death.  Like many who have lost influential loved ones, I am faced with ever present grief over this loss.  As time passes, the grief does not lessen, it intensifies--fewer and fewer folks still living persist to carry on her memory.  You know the old trope, “They’ll live on in your memory.”  But the more time passes, the closer you get to your own death, and with that comes another death for those living in your memory.  So the trope becomes less and less comforting; instead, for me, it causes anxiety.

 

 

 

 

My acute grief coincides with a time when many folks are working socially and politically to suppress stories and content that is violent, “unfair” and horrific from the classroom, in literature, science, and history.  This is not a new phenomenon.  I believe Freud called it “repression” but we have lots of additional tools in our social and psychological tool box for coping with the realization that bad things are happening all around us, every day. I'll give you a hint, it is a fool's errand to think you can elude this reality, just as it is a mistake to wallow in grief about it.  Both paths lead to only more pain, for you and for others in your orbit.

One of the coping mechanisms we use to handle the horrors of life is telling ourselves bad things don’t randomly happen to good people.  We wrestle with the idea that perhaps there is some “deserving” justice to life, even if its immediate logic evades us.   We tell ourselves we can elude life's pain by being strong enough or smart enough or manipulative enough to overcome whatever the bad guys throw at us.  It's the stuff of myth, we celebrate those who seem to have achieved those goals.  In our myths, bad people come to bad ends and virtue is rewarded.  But as I tell my students when describing the physical rules of thermodynamics governing the behavior of matter and energy in the universe, "Nature bats last."

Also among these conceptions about nature is the maxim “survival of the fittest” or “natural law.”  Unfortunately as a result of the semantics problem between its usage in science and common language,  the word “fitness” conjures up images of vim and vigor, of good and virtuous ideals winning out over the unfit ones.  But that is not the case: “fitness” in an evolutionary context simply means the ability to survive current conditions and having a population with the genes capable of surviving future challenges.  Biological life is all about reproducing and have one’s offspring continue the pattern.  It’s not survival of the good, bad, pretty, ugly, smart, dumb, noble or cheat.  It’s just survival of whatever works moment-to-moment. Nature and human history is rife with examples of the easy crushing of human conceits.  The most powerful forms of evil fall away against the mists of time; the most awesome beauties erode, only to be replaced by new versions of both . . .

So another coping concept humans developed was the idea that somehow, somewhere, outside of this confusing material world, exists a place where we will be free from all the “bad” and can revel in all that is “good.”  Either we can create it here on earth (nice work if you can get it), or we go there after death.  Usually with the caveat, “If we play by the rules while alive.”  While this is a reasonable thought--perhaps materialism isn’t the only plane of existence--it’s impossible to prove with the tools of the material world.  I find the idea of our loved ones living on, in a “better place,” comforting.  It’s plausible, but I have no logical reason for certainty in this matter, (String Theory aside).  It would be wonderful, and it has the trappings of a reasonable moral equation.  But heaven or nirvana or whatever you want to call it, still exists as a concept in our own minds, collective or otherwise.  As an actual reality, well . . . one can try to get there, just ask Siddhartha.  Ye olde “On earth as it is in heaven.”  This is an endeavor I find helpful in assuaging my grief, as long as I don’t get too attached to the certainty I can achieve it.  It’s nice when grace shows up, it will and it does, but if you want it too bad, it may elude you.  Instead, its better to learn to recognize it and be grateful.  Ye olde, "Glass half full" theory . . .

So recognizing the material world has functional limits to the coping mechanisms it offers for the grief one feels after trauma or death, (in my Mother’s case she suffered both), what can one do when faced with it?

There are two things I do to cope.  One came to me rather late in life–the recognition that by recording and telling stories, we heal and honor the dead.  

Humans have built any number of tangible monuments to memory.  They may not last indefinitely in terms of the time span of the universe, but the act of creating will continue.  We memorialize through art, and LIBRARIANS preserve it, catalog it, and present it.  We’ve had art and literature since the dawn of human civilization.  Cave paintings still exist, Bible stories are still told, prayers are still sung, long after the individuals who created them have passed on.  

I find solace knowing I am not the only one who has walked this path of love and suffering.  I have dedicated my remaining life to serving as a cog in the wheel of the story-telling machine, just as my Mother did before me.  Even the simple act of reading a book honors the existence of the author.  They may be dead, but their thoughts live on in your thoughts when you read their works.  A library is not a trifle. A book is not just a stacked assemblage of ink and paper.  Art and story telling are among the few things truly setting humans apart from the rest of the natural world.  The sharing of art is how we access our souls.  Words matter, let’s not trash and waste them!

The second coping activity in which I participate, harkens back to the opening scene of the creation story, and not just the Christian one.  The story doesn’t start out, “In the beginning, G-d created a fitness center.”  It starts usually in a garden, the human imagination of paradise, a place where nature exists in beautiful harmony.  Raw nature is not necessarily beautiful or harmonious though.  It has two sides, noted by many philosophers.  The canary singing on the skull is one artistic example, or Tennyson’s poem “In Memorium” where he railed against the violence of nature after the death of his friend:

“Nature is red in tooth and claw.  So careful of the type?’ but no. From scarped cliff and quarried stone she cries, ‘A thousand types are gone: I care for nothing, all shall go.”  

However, as many have also noted, although individuals will pass, life will go on.  So for me, the best thing to do in the middle of this carousel ride of life’s ups and downs, is participate in the maintenance of the carousel and facilitate people’s access to a seat.  In that way one can access the soul animating the carousel and keeping it going.  I don’t know if this "soul" is strictly human, it is the larger soul animating the universe.  One accesses the souls of the departed by recalling their history and continuing to partake of their passions and endeavors.  I live and I die, but the struggle for justice is eternal.  As the civil rights anthem says, “Carry It On.”  This is embodied by the Jewish “Prayer for the Dead” called “Kaddish.”  It posits we live on to continue the work of those who have died.  And if that example doesn't ring your bell, try and watch the Disney movie "Coco" without crying . . .

In the vein of continuing family traditions, I come from a long line of gardeners.  People who found solace in nurturing and guiding growing things.  It was no random choice to play, “In the Garden” at my Mom’s funeral, it's no wonder this hymn is popular for funerals. 

I come to the garden alone

While the dew is still on the roses

And the voice I hear, falling on my ear

The Son of God discloses

And He walks with me

And He talks with me

And He tells me I am His own

And the joy we share as we tarry there

None other has ever known

He speaks and the sound of His voice

Is so sweet the birds hush their singing

And the melody that He gave to me

Within my heart is ringing

Respectfully, I don’t literally hear G-d’s voice in my garden.  A special voice and connection is nice to project, but any voice I hear is in my own head of my own brain's making.  But gardening does keep me very busy, it distracts me and occupies my mind.  Visiting a garden is a way to connect to the soul of the gardener.  Individual gardeners live and die, but the act of gardening persists.  I plant trees, shrubs and wildflowers on my property and participate in conservation projects and education.  Individual trees  also come and go, but even if most of the trees I plant die, some will live and pass on their lives through seeds.  Every spring, gardeners will see sprouts of plants popping up all on their own, whether you planted them or not.  

That is when I hear G-d speaking, through the proverbial plant poking up through the crack in the concrete.  The speaking is not with words, but if I were to give it words, it would be, "Nevertheless, I persist."  Or to paraphrase Moses and Jerry Herman, "I Am What I Am."

Meanwhile, the peach tree I planted in memory of the late folksinger John Prine buds out and I recall the words of my late grandmother Sara Rosenberg, “Vos vet zayn?” which in Yiddish means, “What’s it going to be?” or perhaps, “What are WE going to do?”  And what CAN we do?  

Here copied and linked below is a Yiddish poem for an answer.  I would add Rabbi Akiba’s maxim, 

“If you are planting a tree when the Messiah comes, finish planting the tree and then go out to greet him.”

https://yiddishsong.wordpress.com/2010/09/15/vos-vet-zayn-performed-by-rabbi-eli-silberstein/

Zog zhe rebenyu,
vos vet zayn,
ven meshiakh vet kumen?
Ven meshiakh vet kumen,
veln mir makhn a sudenyu.

Tell us, rebbe, what will happen,
when the Messiah comes?
When the Messiah comes,
we’ll make a big feast.

Vos veln mir esn oyf dem sudenyu?
Dem shoyr ha-bor, leviyasan veln mir esn...
oyf dem sudenyu.

What will we eat at the feast?
The Wild Ox and Leviathan we will eat...
at the feast.

Vos veln mir trinken oyf dem sudenyu?
Dem yayin ha-meshumor veln mir trinkn…
oyf dem sudenyu.

What will we drink at the feast?
Preserved wine (from the time of creation) we will drink…
at the feast.

Un ver vet uns toyre zogn oyf dem sudenyu?
Moyshe rabenyu vet uns toyre zogn…
oyf dem sudenyu.

Who will teach us Torah at the feast?
Moses the teacher will teach us Torah…
at the feast.

Un ver vet uns shpiln oyf dem sudenyu?
Dovid ha-melekh vet uns shpiln…
oyf dem sudenyu.

Who will play for us at the feast?
King David will play for us…
at the feast.

Un ver vet uns khokhme zogn oyf dem sudenyu?
Shloymoy ha-melekh vet uns khokhme zogn…
oyf dem sudenyu.

Who will tell us things of wisdom at the feast?
King Solomon will tell us things of wisdom…
at the feast.

Un ver vet tantsn oyf dem sudeynu?
Miryam ha-naviya vet uns tantsn…
oyf dem sudenyu.

Who will dance for us at the feast?
Miriam the Prophetess will dance for us…
at the feast.

Courtship, Marriage and Cheesecake

Earlier this month, I got out an old community recipe book belonging to my late mother, Phyllis Grieve Rosenberg.  The date on it is 1960 – 61, the year she came to live in Coldwater Michigan and give birth to me.  My newlywed Mother was welcomed into the community by many of the wives of my Dad’s friends and classmates.  Marvin Rosenberg was a home town boy but Mom had been born and raised north of Coldwater along the shores of Lake Michigan in the little town of Montague.  The recipe book is titled “Strictly Personal” and it was created and sold by the women’s auxiliary of the Jaycees, as one of their many fundraising activities.  It contains a plethora of useful information on running a household, including financial and housekeeping tips.  There are pages on which to record birthdays and important contact information, and a selection of recipes from the members.   The Jaycees was an organization near and dear to the hearts of our family.  In the late 1940’s and 1950’s it had been an avenue for both my Dad and his brother Sam, to serve the community and channel their energy and ambitions.  The women in Coldwater were no less ambitious and formed the auxiliary, which they nicknamed “The Jayshees.”

The recipe book contains my Mother’s famous cheesecake recipe and I wanted to make it for my Father’s birthday.  What follows is a recounting of the tale of how that recipe came to symbolize so many things to our family, and why it was one of my Mother’s claims to culinary fame. 

Phyllis 1954

Before she met my dad, ever game for an adventure, Phyllis applied for and was accepted to a program for teaching overseas.  She went to Japan where she was the school librarian at an American middle school on an Army base in Tokyo.  Upon her return, she was staying with my grandmother back in her home town of Montague Michigan, preparing to start a new chapter in San Francisco as a middle school librarian.  She had a lot of friends in the Army because of her experience in Japan.

Marvin ROTC graduation, 1953

Meanwhile, my Dad was a lieutenant in the Army and received orders to report for duty in an artillery unit stationed at Camp Claybanks, along the shores of Lake Michigan just outside of Montague.  While there, Dad became buddies with a guy named Dick Garchie, they were a pair of fun loving bachelors hanging out in this little beach town.  Dick was dating a gal who was friends with my mother, and he arranged for Dad to go on a double date with them and my Mom.  Dad was impressed with my mother’s life experiences and vibrant red hair.  He figured she was out of his league.  But they had some things in common, both were the babies of the family and were trying to look after widowed mothers.  They both longed to settle down and create a peaceful home in which to raise a family.  But life took my mother off to San Francisco, and although they parted friends, neither thought that much more would come of their relationship.

About a year later, after having suffered some heartaches in the romantic and business realms, my Dad decided to get away from it all by visiting some cousins who lived out in California.  His plane got rerouted from Los Angeles for some reason to San Francisco and he found himself waiting in a bus stop in Oakland with time on his hands.  He remembered my mother lived there across the Bay and decided to give her a call.  As fate would have it, my mom happened to be home that day from school.  She came to pick him up in her robin’s egg blue convertible.  While waiting, my dad bought a card in the gift shop with a picture of two dragons looking at each other with a puff of smoke between them; the caption was, “Is there still a spark between us?”  It could not have been more appropriate for the setting.

They started carrying on a long distance relationship, with Dad in Michigan and Mom in California.  They sent reel to reel tapes back and forth, which is what people did back before cheap long distance phone service and online chatting.  Dad would go on standby for freight flights out to California to visit Phyllis.  One of those visits was over the Thanksgiving holiday.  Dad sent Mom a list of foods he wanted on the menu—duck a la orange, wild rice, and cheesecake.   Subsequently, this menu was one we often had for holiday dinners at our house when I was growing up.  Mom had never made cheesecake before that pivotal Thanksgiving, but got the mother of a friend to share her recipe and help her.  Unfortunately, the name of the friend and her mother are lost now that my Mom is gone.  I didn’t commit the names to memory and Mom didn’t write them down.  

Phyllis' apartment in Sausalito overlooking the SF Bay

Apparently the cheesecake made quite the impression, since my parents got engaged soon after, then married in Reno Nevada and set up housekeeping in Coldwater, in a cottage on Rose Lake.  Ever after, this special cheesecake was known as the one that sealed the deal with my Dad’s heart.  But if you knew my mother, you knew that was just a small joke, it was so much more.  Phyllis was a great cook, lovely hostess and talented homemaker, in addition to her professional life as a librarian.  

Phyllis and Marvin, 2012

And she was a great Mom too, who taught me to cook, inspired my interest in creating and serving fine and healthy foods and those that could be home grown.  Mom always told me, as her mother told her, “If you can read you can cook.”  I am so happy that in addition to the memories, I have many of her cookbooks and recipe clippings from which to draw inspiration.

So here it is - the famous cheesecake recipe.  Good for warming hearts and minds and remembering an angel in Heaven.

Notes/Changes from printed directions: USE A FULL 1.5 lbs cream cheese, which is the equivalent of three 8 oz. bricks.  Best results in a 10 inch springform pan. Do not use waxed paper to line pan.  Well greased parchment paper may be substituted but is not necessary.  Make sure to grease the sides of the pan if not using parchment paper.  Here's a link to similar cheesecake recipe with photo instructions.  https://cookiesandcups.com/perfect-cheesecake/

Restoring the Witch Hazel Collection and Surrounding Hillside at Slayton Arboretum

In 2015, Hillsdale College adopted a new ten-year master plan for the Slayton Arboretum.  In the plan, one of the goals was to, “restore the historical collections of the Slayton Arboretum, including the witch hazel collection, the lilac collection, and the magnolia collection.”  Of the three collections, the witch hazel collection was chosen to concentrate on first.  The collection is located in an area that presents many opportunities for visitors and Hillsdale College students to access and learn from the restoration, as well as enjoy the new landscaping.  Concurrently, the College began offering an environmental stewardship class which included having students participate in projects at the Arboretum as part of their hands-on learning.  The initial class chose to focus on what was needed to restore the area around the witch hazel collection for their Arboretum projects.  More about the class can be found by clicking on this link.

With regards to stewardship, we use Aldo Leopold’s environmental ethic as an overarching principle to evaluate our efforts.  His ethic provides the link between what we learn as scientists and what we do as stewards to apply our scientific understandings.  Leopold states, “A thing is right when it tends to preserve the integrity, stability and beauty of the biotic community.”

Together, the two goals merge into an approach that includes restoring the witch hazel collection and the hillside community around it.  Simply stated, we seek “to create a landscape that enhances and compliments the growth of witch hazels and facilitates the long term beauty, maintenance and sustainability of the site.”

As we began to plan the restoration, we noted that the site provides several challenges:

1. Naturally thin soil due to mixing of glacial till from moraine.
2. Disturbed area due to gravel mining.
3. Sloped area prone to erosion.
4. Presence of fill material including crushed concrete and asphalt left over from heavy machinery brought in to erect telephone poles.
5. Rainwater and salty meltwater running off of adjacent service road.
6. The presence of a large number of invasive species, several of which create conditions that are detrimental to the growth of other plant species.
7. Problems with deer getting into the Arboretum and heavily browsing on the plant collections.

We developed a strategy plan to meet the challenges.  It includes:

1. Finding a reference site to serve as a role model
2. Removing and controlling invasive species (and repairing damage they have caused)
3. Mapping the restoration area and surveying existing vegetation.  Monitoring vegetation installation and health.
4. Monitoring soil health.
5. Controlling erosion.
6. Managing deer.

Our reference site

Stewardship Class on trail through Lost Nation State Game Area

Lost Nation State Game Area, located south of Hillsdale about ten miles away, provides a perfect role model for our restoration efforts at the Slayton Arboretum at Hillsdale College.  The trails around “Lake Number Eight” in the preserve have many of the same qualities of the Arboretum, including hills created by glacial till, and adjacent wetlands.  The forest community along the lake is home to many native witch hazel plants.  The relatively undisturbed character of the natural community provides us with a reference model of what an ecologically intact and stable landscape might look like.  

In our study of this reference site, we used two scientific concepts to guide our understanding.  One was the idea that certain plants naturally associate together in communities, based on common ecological needs.  Resources in these communities are partitioning into niches that the various plants fill.  These plant associations have been given the name “guild” by advocates of permaculture, a landscape design philosophy based on creating man-made environments that retain the functions of a natural community. 

The second concept we used to help us evaluate the quality of our reference site, was doing a “floristic inventory” and diversity assessment.  Based on the work of pioneering botanists Gerould Wilhelm and Floyd Swink, this method of evaluating “ecological integrity” relies on the idea that plants are excellent indicators of environmental quality since they are totally dependent for survival upon the characteristics of the environment in which they are found.  They can’t move.  So the presence of certain environmentally sensitive plants indicates a pristine environment.  Plants are given “coefficients of conservation” by knowledgeable botanists--a numerical score based on whether they are sensitive or not to environmental degradation.  The stewardship class surveyed the site near Lake Number Eight and recorded the plant species found living near witch hazels.  We used this list to develop the plant list for restoring our witch hazel area at the Arboretum, seeking to create guilds similar to the ones we found at the State Game Area.  Using the floristic inventory, we discovered that most of the plants associated with witch hazel are moderately sensitive to environmental disturbance, so recreating an environment where they can thrive is a modest and hopefully achievable goal for our restoration effort. 

What's In a Witch Hazel Guild?

Arrow-leaved Viburnum

Some of the ground cover plants associated with witch hazels include blue-stemmed goldenrod, various asters, and false solomon’s seal.  In the shrub layer of the forest, common witch hazel associates include blueberry, maple leaved and arrow leaved viburnum, small musclewood trees, wild currant, and alternate-leaved dogwood.  The forest canopy was dominated by red oaks and shagbark hickory, along with red maple and black cherry.

Invasive Species

Conservation Club Members vs Honeysuckle Shrubs

At the Slayton Arboretum, we have several “most wanted” weeds on our invasive species list.  Although there are many weeds, we are focusing on the weeds most likely to inhibit the growth of desirable plants.  These weeds include Norway maple, known for aggressively out competing other plants, Asian honeysuckles, which grow rapidly and exude chemicals into the soil which inhibit the   growth of other plants (if the thick tangle of honeysuckle shrubs wasn’t enough!), and garlic mustard, which spreads by root colonies and seeds, and also exudes toxins that inhibits the growth of other plants.  Additional problems include the prolific seedlings of smokebush and buckthorn trees.  We have ongoing help from the College’s Conservation Club and Tri Beta Biology Honor Society, who come out every fall and help us battle and remove the invasive plants on the Arboretum’s hillside.

Mapping the Restoration Site

The next step in restoring the witch hazel collection was to survey the remaining trees and shrubs on the site after the invasive species were removed.  Again, or intrepid Environmental Stewardship class undertook this project in the fall of 2015, going beyond the call of duty to survey the area during an early snowstorm.

Soil Monitoring and Deer Browsing

Two additional Environmental Stewardship student groups developed a soil monitoring protocol and a deer management plan for the witch hazel restoration site.  During the soil monitoring study, it was observed that hillside erosion from runoff coming off a recently widened adjacent service road was having a severe impact on the natural amphitheater next to the witch hazel collection area.  We realized that this runoff could be channeled into a rain garden.  This became the next step in the restoration.  The rain garden and additional soil remediation will address the problems of erosion and poor soil due to large amounts of fill and gravel left on site.

Deer browsing continues to be a problem and will be addressed in the future by using cameras to monitor the fence line around the Arboretum for potential deer intrusions.  Once the weak areas of the fence have been identified, we can shore up these areas.  Meanwhile, we use fencing and deer repellent to protect the plants in the collection.

The Rain Garden

The first step to creating the rain garden was the installation of a drain tiling system along the service road that channels runoff to the garden area.  This was completed in the fall of 2016.  The rain garden was excavated and compost from the City of Hillsdale was donated to improve the soil’s moisture retention capacity in the area of the garden.  During the grading and excavation of the rain garden, it was observed that the fill dirt remaining in the area created a significant problem for having plants grow and flourish.  We realized we needed to bring in a significant amount of compost and mulch in improve the soil.  Fortunately for the success of the project, the College purchased a large lot of compost, peat and tree and shrub soil at a soil auction, which will be used to amend the site.  We are in the process of moving six pallets of new soil and another pallet of peat to the site.

Here is a rough drawing of what the rain garden will look like. 

It will be framed on the left by two 

small trees—yellowood and ironwood.  In the back will be a mix of evergreen concolor firs and juniper trees, providing a fall contrast for the reds and yellows of the witch hazels and other shrubs.  The berms in front of the water absorption areas will be planted with wildflowers, and the garden will be accented with witch hazels and other forest understory shrubs including viburnums, sweetspire, dogwood and blueberry.

Future Directions

Once the rain garden has been installed, the Arboretum staff, along with volunteers and future environmental stewardship classes, are committed to:

1. Monitoring and continued control of invasive weeds.
2. Future plantings along other areas of the hillside.
3. Continued monitoring of the soil, including studying the bacterial composition of the soil, and continued improvements to the soil through the addition of compost.
4. Implementation of deer management strategies.
5. Extension of restoration efforts to the natural amphitheater and hillside across from the heart-shaped pond.
6. Continuing to educate public on restoration efforts and stewardship of the arboretum.